It’s not possible to stress how badly I have cooked my whole life. It started when I was a kid trying to cook. It really only went downhill from there. It was defeating. I have panic attacks when someone decides to have a potluck. Office potlucks terrify me. I don’t even like to eat them because I can’t dare to contribute to them. Food and cooking has been a nightmare my whole life. Most of my life I haven’t even enjoyed eating. I’ve only eaten to survive. Could this be a root cause of my fibromyalgia?
I had a doctor once who acknowledged that my body doesn’t metabolize food properly. She used to tell me it was like my carburetor was broken. And genetic testing has proven her right. If I metabolize food the way I metabolize medications, then I would need more than most people to get the proper amount of nutrition for some foods, less than most people for other foods, and there would be about 25% of foods that I could eat a normal amount. And of course, 25% that I shouldn’t eat at all (I have those identified as sugar and processed foods, no peanuts either). I’m not allergic to foods, but I’m intolerant, and my body rebels by ignoring what I eat or over compensating.
So I’m eating differently now. I’m not weighing my food or measuring it or counting calories. I don’t care about my weight. I care about mobility and functionality, which I’ve lost steadily over a few years and rapidly in the last few months locked away in my house. Instead, I’m eating as much as I want three times a day, but primarily vegetables rich in nutrients. I’m not depriving myself of anything because I’ve completely stopped craving everything. It’s like a miracle, but it’s very new, so I wouldn’t put it past myself to completely mess up tomorrow. However, today, I’m golden.
Anyway, since it’s new, I’m going to try to record some of the foods I’ve been throwing together. I get bored with recipes, and they’re way too nit-picky. I’m going to do this instead.