2/6/2018

It’s Tuesday which means aqua zumba. I did pretty well with it last week. So well it sort of knocked me on my butt. That’s actually good news. As I get more energetic with the walking and losing weight, it’s going to be easier to go too far. I’m pushing myself a little too far at times already, so I have to be a bit careful about how much I do. One of the most frustrating things about fibro is the mindfulness aspect. It’s a vicious circle. You can’t just do what you want to do – you have to be mindful so you don’t overdo it. But when you think about how much you hurt or pay too much attention to your physicality in general, it emphasizes the pain, and you hurt more, so you have to be mindful…about being mindful. It’s always in the back of your mind. Like a mosquito in a tent overnight on a camping trip buzzing in your ear just as soon as you get comfortable. Get up and move, but not too fast, keep in mind not to overdo, but don’t think too much about it. It’s easy for people who have not dealt with the conundrum of fibromyalgia to not understand the psychological aspects of fibro, the constant stress, knowing, even when you feel well, that you have to plan for the pain, but if you plan too much, then you don’t move enough. I’m old, so I grew up watching Kathy Rigby at the Olympics, doing one of the first backflips on a balance beam. It seemed miraculous and a little impossible. That’s really what we do everyday, the impossible. We do everything we can to stay on the balance beam.